UN: Epicyon -Text

[heromedal]

With all of the extra time due to the break, I'm looking for new projects. Apparel, mechanical devices, weaponry, etc. I'm also willing to research spells or other topics.

If it's for personal use, I'll work out a price of some sort but equipment for use in serving the academy's goals I don't see any reason to take from people when it benefits us all anyway.

You don't necessarily need to know what you want- if you've just got a problem, creating a solution would be my part of the process.

Contact me here or ask for Rex in the Anvil, I'm there most days, the staff know me. If it's closed, I'm probably in the Hall of Pythia. Or the Legionnaire Quarters. Thinking about it, just contact me here.

[ Because he could also be in a cave somewhere being weird or in a van being weird or planting onions in the woods. ]

Comments

[heromedal]

As someone who has always lived in the Real World, it has invariably seemed a fact of life to me. I don't envy having truth thrust upon you.

Also, I'm fine. Don't worry so much.

[ Says him, a Worry Tumour, the badass grandma of a Worry Wart. ]

[transfusionem]

Eh, the truth isn't so bad. Just a lot to take in.

[And that's...mostly true. While she wishes she had learned about this kind of stuff a different way, she's...okay with being here. Mostly.]

I'll believe it when I see it.

[And don't tell her what to do!!]

[heromedal]

To be perfectly frank I find the secrecy surrounding it to be baffling. It's extremely impractical.

And how exactly would I be capable of proving this particular hypothesis?

[NO you don't tell HIM what to do!!! Him BIG BRAIN do as say!!!!!!? ]

[transfusionem]

I don't know how the world as a whole will take "Everything you thought you knew about the world is a LIE" but it's probably a good idea to get it out there before Nightfall happens.

You could start taking care of yourself, for one.

[It's very simple!!]

[heromedal]

I don't truly understand why we started lying about it in the first place. It all seems a little silly, but then again most traditions are.

I've been doing that the whole time.

[transfusionem]

I dunno. Maybe people thought it was safer that way? Or they want to keep all the good stuff to themselves.

lol okay. Whatever you say.

[heromedal]

I'm inclined towards the latter. It certainly seems in keeping with what I know of mage clans to be selfishly obsessed with secret-keeping.

[ He's not fond of mage clans, being a weirdo who taught himself magic. Tell him your secrets, mages. Part of the reason he prefers to be called a wizard. ]

Please don't be sarcastic about my self-reliance.

[transfusionem]

I doubt all clans are that bad - but I think it's just a natural thing, to want to keep things secret and safe. Kind of dumb when keeping it secret could lead to a bigger risk down the road compared to sharing it.

[Technically, Adelaide's cover is that she's being sponsored by a mage clan, but, you know. She knows nothing about mage culture.]

I won't be sarcastic about it when you actually take care of yourself beyond the barest of minimums.

[heromedal]

I can assure you that the majority of them are awful.

[ Of course, his experiences are skewed because a) his mom took him around the world to watch her headbutt evil mages to death and b) he then worked for the same sort of mages.

The nicer sort he's had little interaction with and what there was mostly like... Stealing from them. ]

You'll have to give me an example of what you mean by that.

[transfusionem]

You'd know better than I would.

[At least when it comes to magic and everything involved with it. She's still got him beat on how to be a normal ass person.]

I think the most obvious example would be pretty, you know, obvious.

[Remember when you almost passed out from blood loss? Sure, that was for a purpose, but Adelaide remembers hassling you into taking some rest!]

[heromedal]

Though I will confess as I've never been a part of one all of my interactions are as an outsider.

[ Weird ass hobo wizard, ain't got no family, nothing beats the hobo life, stabbing folks with my enchanted knife. ]

I meant examples of how exactly one would meet your standards for 'caring for myself.'

[transfusionem]

Still more on the inside than some of us.

[Which is a hell of a thing to think about.]

You could start by sleeping every night.

[Which shouldn't be asking a lot, but it's Rex.]

[heromedal]

I suppose- just another viper in the pit.

[ cheerful ]

I do. This is just my face.

[ People fall for that a lot more than you'd think because they feel bad for insulting his face accidentally. ]

[transfusionem]

You're not THAT bad.

Your face would look a lot better if you got adequate rest.

[Adelaide will insult him. She don't give a fuck. (She gives lots of fucks.)]

[heromedal]

Just a phrase.

[ That literally no one has ever used but him. ]

It would also look better if I had another face, but this one was a gift, so I shall keep it.

[transfusionem]

Uh huh.

[She doesn't think so!!]

If it's a gift, you'd think you'd take better care of it.

[She would tell Rex that his face isn't so bad, constant exhaustion asides, but she feels that would lessen her point.

...Also telling someone they're objectively hot is a kind of weird Adelaide's not ready to commit to.]

[heromedal]

[ Not gonna rebuke an 'uh huh.' Gonna let that drop. ]

There's only so much I can do when this is what my face looks like at the best of times.

[ He's sticking to the idea he just looks like this, in the hopes she feels worse the longer he sticks to it and gives up. ]

[transfusionem]

There's a lot you can do. Like sleep. And eat. And generally not work yourself to death. It'd take you from a nine to an eleven.

[She does feel a little bad, but she's also stubborn enough to really dig in her heels.]

[heromedal]

What do those values signify?

[ Beep boop Rexbot. ]

[transfusionem]

It's just a shitty way of ranking how hot someone is on a scale from one to ten, with ten being "hot as hell".

[Someday you'll learn.]

[heromedal]

[ Huh. Well, that's new informa t i o n

ten is "hot as hell" and she thinks he's currently a nine and could hit eleven

Oh no.

He's really glad he's warded his phone against damage because he throws the damn thing against the wall and looks around for the nearest window, before he works out there's no point jumping out of it to escape a text.

Aww crap. What did he do to this poor girl!? Is this some sort of side effect of drinking his blood? What is he going to do?


He's going to wait forty-five minutes to calm down and reply with- ]

Good one.

[ Because now he's thought about it calmly, she was clearly making fun of him. ]

[transfusionem]

[Adelaide is blissfully unaware of Rex's crisis, which...is probably for the best. She would be in that uncomfortable area where you feel bad for shattering someone's world, but also would want to laugh because his reaction is completely ridiculous, and that would probably make him feel worse.

The reply takes so long, though, that it takes her a moment to realize what he's talking about.

Man. She feels kind of bad for him.]

It wasn't a joke. I don't make jokes like that! That's just mean.

You're not half-bad, but you'd look better if you looked less like death.

[heromedal]

I keep telling you, this is just what my face looks like and nine is already ridiculously high anyway, isn't it? Anyone would be satisfied with a nine. Nine is a lot higher than I'd ever expected as it is. In fact, I'd say if you were to ask one hundred people a nine would be a statistical outlier by a significant margin.

[ Ah crap he shouldn't have said all that in one text it looks weird. ]

[transfusionem]

[That is...a lot.]

Are you embarrassed that I called you hot?

[heromedal]

[ “I’m as much embarrassed on your behalf for saying it” he almost says. And other things, like about how is that even a question that needs asking.But after about half an hour he settles on-]

Yes.