un: likesflowers | late night thoughts about mortality with a ten year old

[alreadyhuman]

[ This post shows up at one of those 'no reasonable person should be awake at this time' hours, like 4 in the morning. ]

If you knew you were going to die

How would you feel? what are you meant to feel?

[ Vivi is not even remotely tech-savvy enough to know how to conceal his identity, so this is a great look into his mental state right now.

Which is to say: not good. ]

Comments

[improbablenotimpossible]

[He opens the door, and quickly moves to clear his usually unused bed so Vivi can sit - kneeling to hug him once he comes in]

I wish I could give you a more firm answer for this.

[alreadyhuman]

It's okay. [ His voice is wobbly. ] I guess it's so big and difficult that everyone has different answers for it...

[ This is the voice of someone trying to convince himself that it's okay to feel dreadfully alone during an extended confrontation of your own mortality and failing. ]

[improbablenotimpossible]

You don't have to be okay with it.

[Even if he can't drink it, he has a kettle at ready, setting it to brew]

That's... part of existing - is feeling things, bad and good. It took me a painfully long time to accept that.

[alreadyhuman]

[ Vivi takes the opportunity to just flop onto the nearest soft surface. Being in Sherlock's presence is reassuring, at least. ]

What if I don't want to feel like this, though? It's confusing, and it hurts...I don't like it...