un: weaseling

[deuteranope]

anyone else missing a bunch of socks

I got a black one here someone might be wanting back

[for uh

reasons]

there a weird fucking gremlin thing that goes around taking socks in any myths? this is fucking ridiculous

Comments

[deuteranope]

I'm telling her you said that

[Gets his holes patched up... Better than Maverick, really, who just let his clothes fall apart until Ramona somehow found out his uniform needed repairs and made him bring it home.]

DUDE WHAT SHITTY SHOES YOU BUYING THAT FALL APART IN MONTHS I'VE HAD MINE LIKE FOUR YEARS

[they're beat to hell, but still!!!]

[unpocoloco]

Good. Tell her she's a traitor and that her talons need a filing and that I'm never doing that thing she likes again. She'll know what THAT means.

Didn't you know? The outlands are just full of shopping centers! Just twelve pesos and you too can be used as a toothpick by some ungodly creature.

I haven't bought shoes in over a decade, chamaco, I don't remember where the heck I shopped, but I'll tell you one thing. Four years? Definitely a lie. You're yanking my chain. Or your Mamá's been replacing them without telling you.

[deuteranope]

tell her that yourself so I can record you and laugh

[IT SOUNDS SO WEIRD HÉCTOR WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT IN PUBLIC]

thought that service was free you're some fucking idiot if you thought you had to pay

Mama isn't the quietly replace things type

now I ain't saying they don't look like shit and aren't worn down in places and haven't gotten some fixes but for real I've had a lot of the same shit since I was like 14

[unpocoloco]

Oh no. I'm not getting myself mauled today, thank you.

[And if he details The Thing then Maverick will do it and that defeats the whole point.]

And speaking of mauling, that was obviously sarcasm.

So what, you don't grow or something? Never walk anywhere or do anything? Where the heck are YOU buying things?

[deuteranope]

[He doesn't want to discuss doing The Thing to a cat, stop saying it so weird!!!

And...maybe...he doesn't grow...shut up]

you just wanna jack my style because I'm hot shit huh

[unpocoloco]

JAJA! Ay, that's a good one, kid! Haven't laughed like that in a while. Jaja, oh no, Chamaco, I don't need style tips.

[deuteranope]

damn dude you dress that way on purpose

[unpocoloco]

You better not be talking about my jacket. Or the scarf. Sure the uniform isn't the coolest but there's nothing wrong with MY stuff.

[deuteranope]

some people fucking pull off hobo chic and then you exist too I guess

[unpocoloco]

Said the kid ushanka hat and the fingerless gloves. Don't you talk to me about hobo chic.

[They're just going to pass right over the fact he was actually homeless.]

[deuteranope]

[details...but there is a reason he didn't go for "dude you look homeless" outright.]

yeah I'm in the former category fucking obviously

[unpocoloco]

By who's vote? Certainly not mine.

If you say your Mamá's you automatically lose, for the record.

[deuteranope]

I'll have you know Mama is galmourous and perfect

[...and wishes he would buy some new clothes that weren't black and printed with blood patterns, but whatever.]

[unpocoloco]

That's cute. But it doesn't matter how stylish she is. You can't use her vote. Mamás are inherently biased.

[deuteranope]

it's not cute it's fact

and that isn't necessarily true sometimes moms are shitty you're just more familiar with shitty dads

but yeah Mama is best mom

[unpocoloco]

Fact doesn't make it less cute. Or sweet.

That may be so. But the way I see it a bad mother isn't it a Mamá.

[He'll have to disagree on that last point, but in this case he'll do so quietly. Coco's Mamá is the best.]

[deuteranope]

[Tía's pretty cool, but Ramona will always be the best forever.]

all depends on fucking labels and how you define em

anyway I guess we're admitting I'm cute super cute I pull off this look because otherwise I wouldn't be as fucking cute as I am which is apparently so fucking cute

[unpocoloco]

You ever see a little kid put on clothes that don't fit, wandering around, making a mess? That's cute. That's not pulling off a look.

[deuteranope]

I'm just so distracted by the fucking implication that I'd be around kids enough to see that

[unpocoloco]

Hey, I don't know your life. I could see you as the kind of person who likes to babysit. Maybe not the one parents would choose to be a babysitter but that's just because most parents try to keep those f-bombs out of a kid's mouth for at least a few years.

[deuteranope]

I am not babysitter material

haha yeah I was six because Mama didn't give a fuck

[unpocoloco]

If you say so.

Why doesn't that at all slightly surprise me?

[deuteranope]

because dumbass I already told you she's the best!

[unpocoloco]

Alright, alright, you go on ahead and think that but some of us want our kids to grow up without job-risking habits.

[deuteranope]

I'll have you know I have three parttime jobs and one is nepotism, one is a pity bribe or some shit, and the last one is real as can fucking be I earned that shit