Maverick | Bitch Ricky Marten-Taylor (
deuteranope) wrote in
irisnetwork2019-10-21 08:36 am
un: weaseling
Note/textbook highlighting/ease of reading
€10-15
Editing/proofreading
€15-20
Tutoring: french, eng, maths, science
cost depends on grade and if they're fucking annoying
Coffee delivery
cost of drink/food + €5
Tattoo design
depends what it is but they can just go to a real fucking artist if I don't cut the cost
Catsitting
€10/hr maybe just cat glamour shots
Fistfight
do this shit for free
Drinking buddy
pay for my drinks tbh
Healing??
no fuck charging for that
and tell them all to get me shit for bday
[when you accidentally post instead of saving a draft]
€10-15
Editing/proofreading
€15-20
Tutoring: french, eng, maths, science
cost depends on grade and if they're fucking annoying
Coffee delivery
cost of drink/food + €5
Tattoo design
depends what it is but they can just go to a real fucking artist if I don't cut the cost
Catsitting
Fistfight
do this shit for free
Drinking buddy
pay for my drinks tbh
no fuck charging for that
and tell them all to get me shit for bday
[when you accidentally post instead of saving a draft]

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thank god I don't tan when I fucking have to be out in the sun...
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[And then...after he's had some time to get riled up and to calm back on down:] you ever hear of some shit called hamon?
this sounds like updog but it's not I'm legit asking and I hate it
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But no. Can't say I have. Do I get a hint for context?
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but nah was just curious
guess it's something like radiance
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Hmm, well. I'm mostly the Outlands and Normal People guy as far as magical knowledge goes, but there's certainly staff who would know more about different kinds of radiance and how it works. If there's something you're looking into, I'm sure there's someone who could help. Heck, even one of the older daemons might know something.
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I'll just fucking read about it thanks
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Hey, I don't know how important it is to you! Maybe you want to toughen up those candle powers, I don't know!
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and yeah fucking of course but that's because I'm so fucking cool and will fucking experiment
[but lol he's not bitter about being told No or anything]
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Anyway, I stand by what I said. You could do camaflogue. Or highlight paths! Especially if you could make it go far.
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distance or not I can't just fucking change all colors of everything dude
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You can't fault me for not knowing, I've only had one demonstration, you know.
But more to the point, you could probably fix that. I know I just said I'm not an expert on candles, but I've seen cases where powers weren't working as well due to a metaphorical crossing of wires. Like conflicting abilities, blight and radiance together, or just not knowing how to convert personal magic to spellwork or vice versa. You've probably got a block of some kind, something you need to re-root. No big deal. Certainly not permanent.
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I'm just saying, if you wanted to, it could be something to look into.
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I dunno
I'm fine
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If you ever change your mind though, I can offer tips. Perfectly free, no pressure to test it.
[Mostly since he wouldn't be able to help test it for long.]
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[Give him tips but don't make him ask for them........]
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This all going to sound like it's super obvious and super corny too, but I swear by it and I know others who do too. And I'm going to talk about blight, but let me get there, this is more universal than that.
When I first got here I really didn't know anything about spells. I knew Imelda could do them and mi hija would too, little things here and there sometimes, but it wasn't something I considered myself able to do. And then, with blight, I wasn't sure where the heck I was supposed to be pulling this magic stuff from. But I was listening to a lecture one night in one of the evening classes, heard some talk about how candles pull on their radiance as the source of power and channel into whatever it is they do unconsciously and it hit me. I had magic the whole time, I was just using the wrong batteries, so to speak.
Blight itself is a source of magic, different from a candle's flame but still something. I use magic to shift back and forth, as you know, and I do so consciously. Just being here, most of us have some kind of ability we already tap into at will. So, if I want to do a spell, put forth magic into it, then what I need to do is kind of trick my blight. I draw on power I know how to use and then I push it in another direction just before it takes hold. If I want to do a spell for light for example, I draw on my blight and channel it, usually lighting up a little bit myself without shifting.
Now, to channel it, it's good to visualize. You want to find the power you'd usually use and imagine it extending past you, just in the moment of doing a spell. This is what I'd recommend for someone struggling with spells specifically, but it also works the other way around. If you're having trouble pulling out your own magic, stuff you should have but can't seem to use, there's likely something inhibiting you. Sometimes that's another bit of magic, but sometimes it's our own minds. Plenty of cases where people know they have power but struggle to tap it, younger or otherwise. It's not something most human beings naturally come by after all.
There's a chance Imelda has said as much before, but magic is willpower. There's tricks and knowledge and skill and all that, but at it's core, basic magic is wanting bad enough without inhibiting it. You put your whole heart on the table towards what is you're trying to do.
The way that's always worked for me, both when I was figuring things out in this place, and when I felt too messed up to even think about being whole-- until Imelda recommended the same thing-- is this; think of someone who brings you joy. Like I said, it sounds silly, but stay with me. Think of someone you really, truly love. Hold them in your heart and in your mind. Whatever you're about to do, think of it being for them somehow, even just to show them. Want it until you're no longer afraid. Until your wish is bigger than your fear.
And that, by the way, is also how I learned not to be afraid of playing for crowds as a kid and to play better in general. Kind of funny how that works out.
Your radiance is blocked somehow, but not entirely. You have your color magic. You know how to use it. Reach for it. But instead of drawing it up like I'm talking about, dig deeper. Like you're holding your breath before a dive. Keep going until you feel something, but naturally so. If you're kicking yourself when it doesn't work, you're going too hard. But if you hold that important person or thing in your mind as you go, I promise you'll find something. And then, just practice. Give it time.
With any luck, some part of that will help you.
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how come shit's never like "say this specific phrase" or "do five jumping jacks" to work it's always gotta be fucking "no dumbass you ain't ~feeling~ correctly" how the fuck else am I suppose to feel
sorry I'm too fucked up and broken for you, world, goddamn
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