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thanks, mav

Offer good one per person, per calendar month.
Please contact with serious offers only.
Full payment required upfront.

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I'm not the one wantonly alchemizing gold!!
Besides, if the authorities ever catch me, Tyzias has bought my silence!
Her secret is safe~

No, you're an accessory, which is still illegal.

Why can't you get a normal job? You don't have to offer your silence for payment, whatever that's supposed to mean.

Edited 2019-02-08 23:23 (UTC)

That requires having marketable skills, Imelda!
Illegal means are just so much easier~

You have plenty of marketable skills, if you put in the effort.

And barring that, I can just give you a job.

I'm suspicious about this job offer...
What sort of job?
What's the pay?
Work hours?
Benefits?

Take care of Pepita while I'm in class.
Feed her, play with her, brush her, make sure she doesn't chew on or claw anything she shouldn't.
Pay is 50 euros per day, but only if you're not otherwise engaged in illegal activity.
Work hours vary, but needed for at least 5 days most weeks.
Benefits are you get to make money with no risk of going to jail.

You gotta tell her not to eat me though!!!!!

She's not going to eat you. She's a foot tall.

You're underestimating her, Imelda!
Don't make that mistake!!

Hmm. Not even a small nibble? A couple licks just to get a taste?

No way no way no way!!
At least offer me life insurance for such a life-threatening job!

Alright. Two years pay in life insurance if Pepita eats you.
Who do you want to name as your beneficiary?

Good, I'm glad we're getting this settled now.
It'll be a 50-50 split between Minako and Ellie.

Alright.
Better be careful now. They might put sardines in your pockets while you're not looking~

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I'd say he might make a good barista or cashier but I dunno if I would trust him near food

Why not?

NEVER MIND THAT I WANT THE SWANK JOB WATCHING PEPITA THAT’S NOT FAIR

What's not fair?

I like Pepita the most so I deserve first dibs

I didn't realize you were even interested in a job.

hey I’m employable

employed even

but I’d fucking drop that shit in a heartbeat if I got to fucking hang out with Pepita are you fucking kidding

What is your other job?

confidential information like that can only be exchanged in person in a setting that is certified cricket-free

Really.

[What kind of job do you even have, Maverick...]

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LOL Don't be silly~
There is nowhere cricket-free.

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